Alone

My daughter is getting married in a couple of weeks. None of my first family is coming. My dad wont come, my brother who lives the closest wont come. My dad has traveled to Washington state and Californina to visit my sister and my brother. My other brother lives near him and he visits him [...]

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Getting by

This last week had been really weird. I feel dead inside but I don’t really feel like I want to cease to exist. I have been pondering the state of things, the meaning of life, God, happiness.
I have so much to be happy about. I should be happy. I spoil it with too many “what [...]

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A Good Talk

Hubby and I had a talk today. I was finally able to make him understand how I am feeling. I think.
I was describing it and he said, “I changed the contract.”
Yes! That is it. We got married and lived 20 years “OUR” way then he changed the contract and took off “His” way. I have [...]

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Time

I’ve had ups and downs. the constant is that I can’t bring myself to believe that I will be exalted anymore. I think maybe it is getting easier as time goes by to accept it.
I still notice the Lord tempering my agony. When things start to feel the darkest, I forget all about or I [...]

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